I know your best friend got a new
boyfriend, hot and charming! Another friend from college got a job with a
bigggggg package! Your ex-boyfriend is getting married and changing dp with the
girl every other day! Your colleague
from previous company got promotion. And that Sharma Ji’s daughter cleared her
CA, now your parents are after your ass with her success stories all the time.
Every time you open your Facebook and Insta, people are getting engaged,
traveling around the world, posting pictures with exotic view of foreign land,
even having babies. Doesn’t it feel like we are already 2nd largest
in population and there is no chance it will get control.
So much happening in the world
around you, Right? And on the other hand, your days passing one by one, by just
existing. Waking up late, sitting on the dirty couch with your headphones and
laptop, liking other’s status and pictures on social media, exploring you tube
, eating and then waking up for whole night. That’s the exact schedule, I tell
you. Everyone is getting serious, working their ass off and you’re still
wondering what to do next? No no, not about life but you’re thinking what to
eat next or which movie to watch after this one.
I know this is really exhausting
but it’s just the start. Its 20’s!! People older than you treat you like kiddo
who is not responsible enough for earning for self, people younger than you
treat you like you are way older than them.. And you’re sitting on your couch
in the front of that corner window on Saturday’s night, thinking about what to
do? Believe me; happens to me every day, every hour!
Every Friday I got phone calls
from so many friends for the parties, get together, birthday bashes, reunion
and what not. But I’m responsible enough to not waste the weekend drinking
away. And moreover who has the enough
guts to get up from my comfort position and get ready to hit the party. I’m not
the one to lose myself on someone else’s tunes. These freaking parties, booze,
dance floors, smokes up are too outdated now.
Sometimes I feel, is this
happening coz I did this way too much and too soon? But everyone else is doing
the same. Why I have to be different? Empty pockets and mind doesn’t allow me
to enjoy my life, career choices and no idea of success hitting my head, and
moreover the loneliness wrapping around me like my best friend. How to go out
and booze and dance like crazy?
And when I tried to do this last
night and be normal like every other person, things even messed up more.
Dressed best in that little black dress, red lipstick, favorite heels and drank
like piss. And eventually, couldn’t control my own fingers to dial the number
of that wrong person. That’s my ex. Ahhhhh.. now imagine, what’s worse!! That
idiot picked up on the first ring. Only my God knows what shit I blabbered in
front of him.
This morning with this fucking
heavy hangover which hammering on my head is really killing. As if this is not
enough, checked my last night phone calls and texts and there is a rage of
memory of last night frustratingly haunting. Yet another mistake. Yet again. Why
and How it messed up again?
Now that’s the worst part of
getting drunk to forget everything wrong happening in your life, it made you
remind the past wrong and good things happened in life. For a moment, you will
remember the good old times and the very next moment there’s a slideshow of all
the mistakes you have done in front of your eyes. And that’s the time SIN HAPPENS!! Just for
the sake of few pretty moments I always hang the future on washroom’s lock and
forget it there.
But again Why me?? Why this is
happening to me in the whole world. But I guess it’s the fault of my twenties
not mine. Already things are not going
right and over this, this shit happened. Really, don’t have a single clue what
to do next.
So I take up a moment to think
about it like a mature and practical person.
I’m sure this may happen with
other girls out there in twenties. So every time things go wrong, take a
moment, cut the crap and keep yourself calm.
In the rage of these shitty
times, read these words
First Breathe.. Things are still not so bad. Try to calm yourself down.
Now you will think, it’s easy to say this to other but hell when it happens to
you. But believe me, it happens with me every time. I committed the mistake
last night again and then woke up with regrets. So I do understand. I do
understand how it feels alone all the time. I do understand what it feels when
your family and relatives expect so much from you and you are tired of these
expectations on your shoulders. I do understand when all your friends are
hooking up and you are the only single one left. I do understand when you wake
up every morning without any goal or reason. I know this is the time you want
someone to appreciate you and to hold you up tight in arms and say those three
magical words. No silly, not I Love You but IT WILL PASS! But believe
me nobody can hold on to you better than you. You can still make everything
work. It’s still not so late.
Just don’t feel defeated. No matter what, keep going. Don’t stop
dreaming, don’t stop running after them, chasing them to the extent you can.
Don’t stop wishing on the shooting stars. Don’t stop day dreaming about your
own fairytale. Don’t stop loving yourself.
DO NOT STOP AT ANY FUCKING COST. Appreciate what you have and know your
worth. Being SINGLE is not a crime. It’s great to be alone than with someone
wrong. Always believe you deserve best, don’t set on less than that.
Do what your heart says. Meet the people you like and let them know
their value in your life, eat your favorite meals like you’re dying tomorrow,
travel alone like the WHOLE WORLD IS HOME, watch your favorite movies again and
again, dance in rain like no one is watching, play with small kids like you
used to do in your childhood, paint for your own happiness, hit the gym like
you want that poster girl figure and abs by today only, write novels about
feelings, failures and everything you want to.
But REMEMBER, do things for your own fucking HAPPINESS!
Everyone make their own mistakes, repeat that same mistake hundreds of
times. But get up back every time you get down. You have still so much left to
do. LIFE IS STILL LEFT TO HAPPEN.
Let it happen!
You haven’t lived half of your life yet. Do every shitty thing that
comes in your mind and 20 years down the line, when you’ll look back, these
memories will make you smile, these mistakes will make you laugh and these days
will make your life WORTHWHILE!
RELAX.. ITS JUST MID-TWENTIES. You will be alright with time. BREATHE
AND LIVE..
LET THE LIFE HAPPEN!