All Alone She Fought!

The rain dew and her tears seemed to wash away all her grief,
yet some are unfathomable which can't be surmised in brief.
Standing alone in an isolated wilderness,
her only pal there was darkness.
Her heart and mind chose different way,
silence had a lot to say.
What shall I tell about her,
who smiled in the time of bother.
Courage and endurance were her jewel,
serenity and absolution filled her well.
Choked voice with tender eyes depicted the desert devoid of rain,
yet patiently suffered all the agony and pain.
Alone she fought her fortitude,
and all alone she fought with sorrows of multitude!!

Always Remember Me Like A Sunray!

 

I did everything you wanted me to do,

maybe I cared too much, more than I should do!

I gave up everything just to be with you,

maybe I loved you too much, I should be like you!

 

I became someone else to get your love,

I should too keep my ego above!

So now that you have left me and we're not together,

I should move on and hope it won't so harder!

 

As we became strangers again,

you must be hoping our paths cross again someday.

I'll make sure we won't meet again,

but deep inside I want you to remember me like a sunray!

 

When I Feel Like Running Away From Everything!!

Sometimes I feel like running away from everything and being in peace. It happens to me several times when I want to just escape, away from people or be invisible. I feel irritated, restless, or don’t want to face anyone. Not friends, not parents, not siblings. I just feel pissed off on almost everything. Being in a middle of hundreds of people, with 300 friends on Facebook, even with a few people who loves me, I feel alone, I feel lonely. When at home, I want to go somewhere and leave the feeling of homesick but the thought of going out doesn’t excite me either. I feel abandoned but I don’t want any company at the same time. It’s so messed up, the life is messed up. But it moves on! I know

Then, I thought to myself to do something about this. If there are things which can turn my mod off, surely there will be things which can make my mood on. I just need to find out what I actually want to do. After all, I can’t run away from reality every time. I guess everyone has their own choices and things which cheer them up every time they feel pissing off, no matter how evil things turned up!

 

So, here’s a list of things I do when I’m upset and feel like running away from everything that exists:

1.     Give time to myself by being me

Sometimes I reach to the level, where I no longer care about what people talk and think about me. I know I can’t do shit about it so I believe better in ignoring. I give myself some time, sit alone by being myself. Do things I love and enjoy my own company and let everyone and everything get down.

2.     Food always cheer me up

Food has the power to change everything wrong happening in my life. And if not, it gives me the power to forget everything for as long as I’m having that food. I order a delicious meal and enjoy it alone. Relish every bite and let my mind wander. It eventually cheers me up every time.

3.     A coffee and a novel always help

This is a kind of therapy, which divert and relax my mind. Yeah, sometimes they even make me cry more because I connect myself with the particular story and characters very much. But at least, it takes me to another world where I no longer in contact with my own problems and issues.

4.     Take a walk and watch the beauty of sunset, ALONE

When I know nothing can make my mind free from the shit going inside my mind, I take a hot shower, wear my favorite dress and take a long walk, ALONE. I always find sunset very mesmerized, the color of the sky turning into different shade of orange, I feel relax. I feel peace. So I take a long walk and appreciate the beautiful view.

5.     Sleep and forget everything for a while

Sometimes, I do need to go in a hibernation mode. Sleep for 12 hours straight. Forget everything and sleep for the whole day. Both my body and mind get relax and I get the much-needed rest. Sleep help me to forget about everything going wrong in my life for a while and feel relax.

6.     Get back in touch with a lost friend

When I probably pissed on everyone and everything in my life, I don’t even want to face them. So I talk to someone who has been out of my life and don’t know what’s wrong going on in my life. Or someone who was once too close but for now we have lost touch. It feels great talking about the good crazy old memories with an old friend.

7.     Imaginary characters always at my rescue

Sometime I desperately want an escape from the world, even if it for a little while. That’s when the fictional world comes to my rescue like a super hero. I watch my favorite movies, or favorite TV series. A comedy or romantic film helps me to get out from my not-so-important grief. I need some time alone with my favorite characters.

8.     Take a looooong shower

It’s not only a great stress buster, it also make my body much clean :p It helps me to feel lighter. Good music, a long shower always make you feel relax. Be in shower for extra long, feel the water droplets on body, embrace myself and my body. The more time I be in shower, the more relax I feel myself.

9.     Give new life to my room

As cliché as it may sound, but it always works. My place always plays a crucial role in my mood swings, so it’s better to clean my room a bit to clear off my mind too. So I take my broom and clean up the fuss (created by me only). I arrange my cupboard, change my bedsheets, line up my shoe rack, delete all those spam emails from my inbox, throw all the useless things I have been piling up. I really feel a thousand kgs lighter, believe me! 

 10.  Look back at my old happy memories

When nothing works, the reminders of good time can really make a change. I go through my old stuff, take out my yearbooks, old albums or scroll really down to the end on my Facebook timeline. I re-read my old status update, look through pictures with friends, without friends. It reminds me how I and my friends used to look, the crazy things we done together, the places I have been. It really cheers me up!

11.   Rihanna and Taylor Swift, always by my side

I can bet that music is the easiest escape from the reality for a lot of people. Personally, my phone is filled up with number of songs but I have special playlist which I play when I everything and everyone makes me feel like murdering someone or attempting suicide. Rihanna, Taylor Swift, Enrique, Atif Aslam, Avril Lavigne are the superheroes who always be my side and rescue me!

I repeat all this things when I feel upset and sad. Though I can’t be upset more than a day and I always find people, place, things to cheer me up at every other point. But this list always on my repeat to make me feel life is still beautiful! It makes me feel relax and motivate me to look forward for something good! After all, I'M ME :)